Father-of-three and podcast host Matthew 'Matty J' Johnson was on Friday named Australian Father of the Year by the Fathering Project for encouraging dads to embrace connection, vulnerability and shared parenting.
"It's about challenging the version that I inherited," he told AAP.
"Growing up I had an image of a man's role, to go out and get a career and make sure the family is financially stable, and a woman's job is to look after the domestic work and the family.
"That's a mould I had to try and remove from my psyche."
He met his wife, fellow podcaster Laura Byrne, during season five of The Bachelor Australia.
Modern fatherhood means being emotionally available for his kids and showing them that strength and vulnerability can co-exist, he says.
"I can play the role of dad whilst also playing that role of being caring, loving, and affectionate," Johnson said.
"When I was growing up I had it so wrong.
"I now know that sharing the mental load, and recognising that parenting isn't just doing the things that you can physically see, and making sure there's a parity of power with my wife, is so important."
The former reality star's podcast Two Doting Dads, with friend Ash Wicks, is one place where Johnston says he feels he can be vulnerable.
But he admits he is still figuring out how to open up with friends.
"I was speaking to a mate, who's got three kids, and I talked about how lonely it can be as a parent," he said.
"My little circle of dads is just being so reduced, and then when I spoke to him about it, he and I had this hesitation of opening up about being lonely."
Johnson said there were a lot of systems in place to support mothers, as there should be, but it was taking time for fathers to get the same backing.
"I think for dads it's still taking a little bit of time to catch up," he said.
"We had some really great community playgroups locally, and I love taking my kids there. The only downside was that it was rare to see another dad."
Australian Sports Father of the Year winner Scott Mutton, a grassroots soccer coach of three decades from regional NSW, said helping children connect to sport in regional areas was his passion.
"Coaching is a bit like being a father. It's very instinctive," he said.
"I've learnt how difficult it is for regional area players. It's hard to have the opportunities of metropolitan kids, so that's motivated me."
Governor-General Sam Mostyn is hosting the awards in Sydney on Friday.
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